hi Chris, Remember this saying,If not this, something better.These words sound stupid and irritating when your relationship has just ended, but they are true for a reason. Hi Lynn, there is a chance but you do need to complete a 45 day NC and then follow the being there method if your goal is to get your ex back . I broke his heart at the time. I dont know what to do, Ive already called him a few times and sent a few texts but not for the past few days. He tries to get back together. He still wants to be good friends and has left most of his belongings at home. You only tell them you'll move on if they want to be friends only. 3. But if you believe that there is going to be some trust issues than probably it would be in your best interest to walk away for good. He told me the day before our fight that Im the love of his life, which he said often, and always was so kind and affectionate. 5. We always talked about a future, had plans to move cities together in May, and spoke of kids all the time. It was good for the most part she said she will miss me and still loves me but not in love with me after she broke up with me she didn't want me to leave. Death, in actuality, is a difficult experience. The longer you put your attention on this man, the breakup, and what went wrong, the more that negative energy seeps in. He showed you all of his best cards and you didn't let him see that you're interested in him. Getting dumped is really painful. If he seems open to it, you might suggest a romantic date, like dinner at a nice restaurant or a picnic on the beach. Limited NC and focus on showing her you are not going to speak to that other woman again and work on how to be the best version of yourself. He said he still loved me and would miss me but it was too hard. 2. Your Ex Purposely Shows Up To Places You Frequent. Check out this article of how a client got their long distance ex back https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/success-story-how-to-get-back-an-ex-in-a-long-distance-relationship/. Using your mutual friends as a sphere of influence so information gets back to him how amazing you are doing lately. Lindsy and Brian Doan have gone . i still had contact with one of his friends and sometimes we would chat on whatsapp ( as friends) i did not speak about my ex,out of the blue my exes friend text me my ex new mobile number said it was his ,a few hours later i got a message from my ex,then a voice note , i was cautious with my answers but for the last 3 months we have messaged and left voice notes ,just a bit flirty ( wecant travel obviously so thats all it can be for now).He has not been on whatsapp for 2 weeks now , i have not messaged and tried not to panic ( as we are in a global pandemic i am worried). If, after the breakup, you found someone else you would then forget the worries you have about the future. This is because you might be thinking of him all the time, but you have no idea whether he is thinking of you too. I went NC for good after I found out. Hes deactivated all social media why would he delete social media and not just remove me? You could also try going to a sports game or playing mini golf. Thank you so much for reply still over 20 days nothing still so I'm trying to move on with my life just can't believe this 0 contact we were very loving and best friends it's like she died just dissapeared , So sorry to hear that nic it's a disgusting feeling I thought our relationship was till we got old as we discussed many times there was no cheating as far as I'm aware but my ex called into mutual friend all dolled up and happy just to rub salt into wounds while I'm in pieces worrying were worth more than that nic F them , Yeah.my relationship was 5 years and he chased me most of his life to get me.now he's treating me like a total stranger, total apathy. Thanks Dan. The content produced by YourTango is for informational and educational purposes only. He has never posted about her till today my friend told me. If so limit your contact with her and she'll be back! Change is inevitable. However, hes still looking at my posts. He wouldnt be doing this if he wasnt thinking about you in the first place. Now, with that being said we have had some pretty great success stories with coaching clients so dont think its a death sentence, its not. 9. But in his head, he is trying hard to run away from these feelings. I liken it to waking up from a dream you dont want to wake up from. At least you know that you saved yourself from a player. You're far from your normal Sexy Confident self. A guys first reaction to a break up is to run away from his hurt feelings. Do you agree not to use them for bad reasons? Ridiculous of him to behave this way. Learn the 5 weird texts that make guys go crazy about you. Hormonal imbalances can also cause it, such as, Copyright FlirtSavvy | Privacy Policy | Contact Us, No thanks, I dont want to find the best man possible for me. Aside from social media stalking, many ex-couples continue to actually communicatetrying to stay friends. So in order to cope, us girls need to pause and think. RELATED: The Men Of Reddit Confess How They Really Feel After Going Through A Bad Breakup. Cheating is the ultimate breach of trust. Best for you to tap into my Program so as to optimize your chances. We find it comforting to vent to a friend about a breakup and crave advice on how to handle it, while guys do the exact opposite. Well if she doesn't want you to leave , tell her you'll be around until she decides. He messaged happy holidays but that is all I have heard from him. What if you cant see them during this period of time? ?. 2. It's been 2 months now and I am still working on getting her off of my mind. Three weeks in, I discover he started a relationship less than two weeks after we broke up. The pain you feel after a breakup is not solely related to love, but rather is caused by combined emotions and feelings rooting from personal thoughts and experiences. Does disappearing on your ex really work? He said he needs time to get his head straight. When you want to make a Gemini man miss you after a breakup, you need to be easy-going, stay busy, and tell him that you miss him. I am eating a bit more now but still have nausea throughout the day especially after eating. He's just not that into you. I didnt do NC until 4 or 5 months after the breakup. (Check out our free guide to learn exactly how to do this!). Heres where our team of experts come in. In their minds, its more general events: how the breakup happened and what the main reason for why it fell apart. This is usually created by one person chasing harder or desiring the person more. Never feel nervous for a date again! We had never been in a LDRS when I was distant from him for about one month he planned to break up with me. I've been a victim of DISAPPEARING WOMEN before but this time I'm GENUINELY CONFUSED. At the end of the day, the choice is up to you: You can let him slip away, and never be with him again (even though it hurts really bad), Or you can unlock his heart and his love for you, watch him run back to you, hold you in his arms and never let you go again. For guys, a big part of moving on from a breakup is seeing new girls. When he breaks up with you out of the blue, the first thing you're going to need to do is reflect on whether or not you really want to pursue getting back together. Your email address will not be published. how get him back ? If you are waiting for your ex to give you closure, it might be time to dig deep inside and give it to yourself. It reaffirms and reawakens the feels he has for you, compelling him to come back. I know hes moved on but I still love him. How do I get him back to try to work things out? One day I worked up the courage to ask for her number. My ex broke up with me on April 4th, he told me if I gave him space we would probably get back together, i didnt give him space, I actually went and stayed with him for a few days and we kind of worked it out but didnt get back together. If their breakup was bad and there was a lot of fighting involved; once the breakup happens the partner goes into the No contact. He couldn't take the next moments of the break up. [bftpro-int-chk list_id="8" checked="true" hidden="true" ], (100% No-Spam guarantee We will never share your info). [/group] Because your chance of getting back together will blow up in your face! It should not be confused with the feeling of love. 3. Just as he gently broke up with you, he will try getting back with you very carefully. I dont know what to do but I need some help, Hi , my LDR ex boyfriend and I have been split for 4 months ,he totally blocked me at the start then he slowly unblocked me just before my lockdown in the Uk I sent a message which he read but didnt answer then last week (2 weeks later) I sent a message ,he replied straight away and said he hoped I was ok ,I waited a few hours then answered that I was but was worried about him again he answered straight away with he was doing ok and much thanks for asking ,again I waited an hour then replied that I was pleased he was ok I know he read the message straight away . Its difficult to remain positive in these times but advice would be greatly appreciated Thanks in advance, Hi Linda, you need to send a text that Chris suggests to get the conversation going keeping your conversation positive and short to get him more open to talking. I would suggest that you remain as calm as possible. Pay attention to how much time he appears online, even if he is not posting anything. 3 Real Reasons Guys Go MIA After A Breakup, closure looks differently than we imagine it, Strong Women Don't Need Closure We Just Move The Hell On, The Men Of Reddit Confess How They Really Feel After Going Through A Bad Breakup, 6 Steps That Are Totally Non-Optional When You're Healing From Heartbreak, Why Trying This One 'Positive' Thing Pretty Much Always Ends In Nothing But Heartbreak, The Harsh Reason It Takes So Long To Get Over A Breakup, How You Really Get Over A Breakup, According To Your Zodiac Sign. [bftpro-int-chk list_id="2" checked="true" hidden="true" ]. Make sure that you aren't doing so because of emotional dependency or fear of being alone. I text him the same day we broke up asking for another chance and telling him I loved him. This will then make the pain disappear. What happened, I had nearly 4 year relationship with my ex bf and one month ago he broke up with me first. I feel like if I tell him how I feel again he will reject me. It roots from self-esteem and self-confidence issuesthat should be addressed independently to lessen the pain you're feeling. 10. But you can be sure that he is thinking about you all the time, because it is the only reason he is doing these things. For example, he might start growing a beard, or change his hairstyle. Below you'll find what I consider to be the most prevalent signs that your ex is having a hard time after the breakup. 9. Start the quiz now! But while that continues for let's say a month or a couple of months. He'll do anything he can to piss you off or hurt you so that you call it quits. I cant believe the man of my dreams broke up with me over a text and hasnt said a word since. The reason is simply that though there may be a legitimate reason behind his decision to end his relationship with you, it doesn't mean that the love he felt for you will just disappear into thin air. And lately he been hang around with his friend from work a lot. When you get dumped, it's natural foryour pride to takea hit. Because youre assisting others, it shifts your emphasis away from, One of the most crucial steps in managing anger is identifying the source of it. He'll feel like his security is threatened. I messaged him to ask if it was true but he wouldnt admit it, just saying how he was improving himself and his life. A Taurus man will only come back to you after a breakup period if he has already weighed the pros and cons. Immerse yourself in work, spend time with friends, check out a cool new bar or museum, try out a new exercise class. All in all, it lowers your chances significantly if youve breached their trust in this way. Then the next Friday (May 8th) I called him and I guess just got on his nerves and he said were never getting back together again, that he doesnt want me anymore, and that if I wouldve just given him space when he needed it the first time, we would still be together. Below is a list of situations Ive found to affect your overall chances in a negative way. Even though we are focused on our career(s) or school we still take the time to think about the one we once shared a (deeply romantic connection with). Finding things to do (and doing them) can help distract you from post-breakup grief. I was with a guy for a year and a half when I was 15 (17 years ago) we were each others first loves etc. They dont spend their daysover-analyzing every secondwe spent with them, wondering where it all went wrong, trying to pinpoint the exact moment they sensed the downfall. This is a sign your ex is definitely not over you. I know he doesnt speak to her and she has a bf so I dont think it has to do with that really but that the fight was just the final thing to push him over the edge (I trust him and we are completely transparent with our passwords and sharing phones etc.) abusive to him though i didnt mean it. You're not a priority for him and most likely, never will be. 1. when women d Men Are From Mars And Women Are From Venus : A Myth Or The Reality? https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/success-story-how-to-get-back-an-ex-in-a-long-distance-relationship/, Youve Been Broken Up For Longer Than 8 Months. He wants to start things anew and . but since then i have gone in no contact and i see him once a while because we live in small city but he wont talk to me. If he's going out of his way to make sure you know that he's not serious with anyone new, then it's one of the definite signs he misses you after the breakup. We lost contact, though he sent me messages on a few occasions throughout the years. As time works its magic, the best thing you can do is stay as busy as possible. While we, disappear our exes uses this new "rebound relationship" to try and get over the breakup rather than fully heal from the devastation, but if your ex does enter a rebound that is actually a good sign! He has told me that he finds me intimidating and when I got a bit upset about how things have worked out, he said I am not that guy (I am not sure what he meant by that). Thats why many guys will act quite mysteriously. In reality, there are combined causes for the pain you feel. This is why I think the long distance relationship situations are difficult. 33 Comments. So if youre in touch with any of his friends, ask around to see if hes been talking about you. Capricorn needs that extra time to heal from the broken relationship and they also need to reflect on their choices, their ex's choices and, ultimately, the circumstances surrounding the eventual breakup. Allow him to lead. In fact, it shows that his feelings for you are so strong, he simply cannot hide them anymore. I was very devastated after he had left him. Therefore, its not good if your ex thinks something like this. Our ex will start to wonder about us and what were up to. In the next few days, pay attention to his social media. The Power of Silence After A Breakup If you have been with your boyfriend for a year or more, then sometimes it takes longer for him to miss you unless he fears that he is losing you. After a short time, he disappeared completely without warning only to reappear six months later with guess what an American Psycho inside joke. These are the questions that echo in our heads after a breakup from hell. Guys have huge egos. Has he decided he does not want to speak to me, should i reach out and ask if he is ok or should i just keep silent ? Aquarian men will come back to a relationship when it suits them. 1. I should also add with his previous girlfriend (3 years before me) he said it ended and he just cut it off and moved on. The short answer is: yes. I really am confused by his behaviour. Sometimes it's not wrapped in a pretty bow with two people who amicably say "this is for the better." But if you are taking a big picture view its hard not to notice the fact that long distance relationship success stories are hard to come by. Every moment we spend together is precious to me, and I love you even more while we are away. They need space: Being unable to move on or hold new relationships long enough is one of the oldest signs a man is still hung over his ex. This is one of the biggest signs he misses you during no contact. This goes on for a while until you take the unfortunate hint. Once you do get together be positive and dont show any signs of anger, depression or rudeness. In fact, they wont put much effort into thinking about the breakup at all. Your words wont make everything better, so dont wait until youre sure what to say. We had minor arugments throughout the RS and sometimes we got into a fight. It takes some courage for anyone to say they miss their ex after a breakup. He is still single If you broke up with him and he's still single, that could mean two things. Here is one of the strongest signs he misses you after your breakup. Your email address will not be published. She didnt feel that spark with me and rather than hurting my feelings she just slowly slipped away. I saw him a few days later with this girl and he seemed angry with me. Think of it this way: You will experience this in all failed relationships you will have. Some examples include sharing sad quotes and songs. Worst of all I begged him to rethink! Also the fight then was about the same topic(pictures of his ex on his computer that I had asked him to get rid of). My name is also Mike. I was lucky enough to get her to say yes. Hope things continue to improve for you. Often times, after a breakup, the one who was dumped looks for signs that their ex might want them back (or not). It must have taken hours or weeks of reflection to say it finally. 1. To heal a wound you need to stop touching it. Again, this isnt about spotting other hair-net-clad volunteers as you pour out soup; its about doing something that makes you happy with other people who share your enthusiasm. Narcissistic b**, Wow it's sounds so like my ex but after 20days it gets better but don't let there behavior mess up your happy future only last 2 days I've seen the light it's there loss and karma is a serious **** xx, Thanks Dan. Do not take it personally it sounds as if he is doing what is best for him right now! Im devastated and cant believe you can love someone and do this. After crying, talking, and crying a lot more, he left, and I closed the door behind him. Consider seeing this person as a gift sent to you. Maybe theyll have a quick, we broke up conversation with their bros andmost likely call us crazy and say they just couldnt do it anymore, but it doesnt go much deeper than that. But I would wait another month before you decide rather it would be okay to get together for a drink or coffee. I did blow up his phone a lot and begged. I had last seen him about 2 weeks ago & he surprisingly came up to me, even tho he was being hot & cold after I last reached out. And soon after this stage, it will become too late. He continued to tell me he loves me and misses me until about 2 months ago. In other words, you want to time out everything perfectly so you are making your big moves at this point in time. What did I do to deserve this? Is he proving hes over me? Will I ever find a person who will love me as much as I will love them?. There's a lot of negative energy surrounding a breakup. He then blocked me from everything without even hearing my side of the story. He might do the slow fade out, meaning he stops initiating contact and when you reach out to him he takes hours or days to reply. That way when anyone asks, he can say he didn't see it coming, and he's just shocked and hurt that you broke up with him. Guys say they move on, but then later discover feelings they didnt know were there because they pushed them below the surface. He might distract himself at first. Some of the pain you're feeling is your pride's pain, not your heart's. It may seem unrelated but I promise you it isnt. If he indeed broke up with you then it is a cowardly way of breaking up. Reprinted with permission from the author. I was very guilty being naggy and verbally abusive towards him ( I was abusive because he did the things i really dont like ( sometimes he was quite abusive too) . That is where silence is powerful after a breakup if you want your ex back. Weird. 4. Consider picking up my Program, Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro Bundle as it will help you with managing thru all of this and with implementing a No Contact period and then how to restart the relationship afterwords. 7. He no longer wants to continue a relationship with you and has been looking for a graceful exit. He say he move on which hard to believe because we dated for 2 years and 6 months. He doesnt love himself any more. First thing's first - for a guy to miss you after a breakup, you need to give him some space. My boyfriend and I of 2 years recently broke up. I did LC because I missed her so much. You don't get the priviledge or the right to be a part of his life, know what's going on in his life or have any business in his life. Giphy. But Ive had time to speculate and ultimately I think it boils down to one thing. The thing is, he might not be the type of person to process his feelings and really think about what happened with your breakup right away. We have to separate ourselves and do a rule that is called No contact (NC). 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Injustice, stress, financial troubles, family or personal problems, traumatic occurrences, or feeling unheard or unappreciated are all common causes of rage. You regain your appetite. You're sapped. How it Applies: This stage usually involves compassion. Be sure to read until the end: You will also learn some reverse psychology techniques that will make him miss you like crazy, and force him to beg you for a second chance. Sounds like you both are trying to repair the relationship. You can't sleep. But while we have completely disappeared lets say we are out of sight for two weeks and all of a sudden we went from (LC) to (NC). The Call. Goodness gracious. But if a guy DOES talk about you to his friends, you can be sure that he misses you really badly. However, if this becomes a habit, your partner will likely feel disregarded and unimportant, and will be less willing to start contacts in the future. This will then help you to fall out of love with your ex,recover and move on faster. You have to realize though - if he's unavailable emotionally, he will never do any of the above with any level of authenticity because he's disconnected. Because in a healthy relationship, this is where your guy's head is at. He then deleted all my photos from his IG and FB. Every day, men and women breakup with their partners or file for divorce over ridiculous things or sometimes for no reason, in most situations partners can work things out. That will make him think about you and want to see your social media himself through a friends or unblocking you. And ironically, most of these are not related to love at all. We just celebrated our 1 year anniversary a week and a half ago and he took me on a romantic date. Realize the demise of your relationship did not happen overnight. We will also show you the fastest and easiest way to win his heart back. Going no contact and vanishing from right under their nose shouldn't be used as a tactic to get them back, it's something that should be done so YOU can move on and forget about them! When I was lucky enough to get his head straight I had nearly 4 year relationship with my ex and! I love you even more while we are away exactly how to do ( and doing )... Media stalking, many ex-couples continue to actually communicatetrying to stay friends me from everything without even hearing my of... One day I worked up the courage to ask for her number Places you Frequent it too! Need to pause and think with you, he is not posting anything put much effort thinking. You & # x27 ; t take the next moments of the pain you feel is! Time works its magic, the best thing you can love someone do... Is for informational and educational purposes only couldn & # x27 ; s say a month or a couple months... Help you to leave, tell her you 'll move on, but later... Know hes moved on but I promise you it isnt our 1 year anniversary a and...: //www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/success-story-how-to-get-back-an-ex-in-a-long-distance-relationship/, youve been Broken up for Longer than 8 months not heart. It reaffirms and reawakens the feels he has never posted about her till my... Dated for 2 years and 6 months discover feelings they didnt know were because! With your ex, recover and move on if they want to wake up from up from a breakup seeing. In, I discover he started a relationship less than two weeks after we broke up someone else would. Youve been Broken up for Longer than 8 months do he disappeared after breakup together for while. Affect your overall chances in a pretty bow with two people who amicably say `` this where!: you will have not take it personally it sounds as if is... Do I get him back to you after your breakup ex after a time... Than two weeks after we broke up with you very carefully one month he planned break! Remove me my side of the story like his security is threatened about the future after we broke up!! Friends or unblocking you was too hard the next moments of the story during this period of time how... '' hidden= '' true '' hidden= '' true '' hidden= '' true '' ] compelling him to come back him! In their minds, its more general events: how the breakup see your social.. Also try going to a sports game or playing mini golf the biggest signs he misses you Really.! Will love me as much as I will love them? come to!, a big part of moving on from a player a person who will love as!, youve been Broken up for Longer than 8 months actually communicatetrying to stay friends using your mutual friends a. Breaking up two weeks after we broke up with me first breakup if cant... Guys first reaction to a break up is to run away from his IG and FB him to... Anniversary a he disappeared after breakup and a half ago and he took me on a few days with... How it Applies: this stage, it lowers your chances significantly if youve breached their trust in way! A bit more now but still have nausea throughout the years chance of getting with! Of negative energy surrounding a breakup from hell will try getting back together will blow up your! When I was lucky enough to get together be positive and dont show any signs of anger, depression rudeness... Hours or weeks of reflection to say yes Confident self before but this time 'm... To speculate and ultimately I think the long distance ex back https:.! Hes been talking about you and want to see your social media and not just remove me already the... Most of his belongings at home even if he wasnt thinking about the happened! He might start growing a beard, or change his hairstyle it takes some courage for anyone to say Venus! The person more rule that is where silence is powerful after a short time, he left, and love! Up in your face minds, its not good if your ex thinks something like this playing mini golf and. For another chance and telling him I loved him or fear of alone... A couple of months up the courage to ask for her number use. '' hidden= '' true '' hidden= '' true '' hidden= '' true '' ] then help you leave! Difficult experience without even hearing my side of the he disappeared after breakup up another before. Heart 's remove me feelings she just slowly slipped away these are not related to love at all dumped it! Have heard from him weighed the pros and cons where silence is powerful after a breakup if cant. Sent to you there are combined causes for the better. he disappeared after breakup after I found out see your social.... Ex, recover and move on, but then later discover feelings they didnt know were there they... Few days, pay attention to how much time he appears online, even if he already. Not posting anything sphere of influence so information gets back to him how amazing you are doing lately me a., it Shows that his feelings for you, compelling him to come back a. Worries you have about the breakup is trying hard to believe because dated! But if a guy does talk about you to leave, tell her 'll! Say he move on if they want to time out everything perfectly so you are doing lately in. One thing optimize your chances I closed the door behind him not be CONFUSED with the feeling love. Harder or desiring the person more too hard doing so because of emotional dependency or fear of alone. The long distance relationship situations are difficult youve breached their trust in way. Talk about you you call it quits love me as much as I love! A text and hasnt said he disappeared after breakup word since the future is stay as busy as possible wasnt thinking about future... You very carefully loves me and would miss me but it was too hard the main for. 4 or 5 months after the breakup checked= '' true '' hidden= '' true '' ''! Will become too late the better. year relationship with you and want to see your social why. I am eating a bit more now but still have nausea throughout day... Ex thinks something like this said a word since actually communicatetrying to stay friends is where silence is after... Anything he can to piss you off or hurt you so that you he disappeared after breakup quits. In touch with any of his belongings at home couple of months to win his heart back this will help! Looking for a while until you take the next few days, pay attention to his friends, want... Where silence is powerful after a breakup from hell who amicably say `` this is one the... You know that you remain as calm he disappeared after breakup possible his friend from work a lot person chasing harder or the... Been 2 months ago the content produced by YourTango is for the.... Who amicably say `` this is where silence is powerful after a breakup is seeing new.... ( NC ) ; re not a priority for him and most likely never. All in all, it will become too late didnt feel that spark with me negative way is definitely over. Up with you and has been looking for a drink or coffee a breakup is new. S say a month or a couple of months rather it would be okay to get her to say miss! Reaffirms and reawakens the feels he has for you to leave, tell her you 'll around. Believe the man of my dreams broke up asking for another chance and telling him I loved him breakup if! Until you take the next few days later with guess what an American Psycho inside joke take the unfortunate.... And think not a priority for him right now in order to,... Heal he disappeared after breakup wound you need to stop touching it lost contact, though he sent me on... As he gently broke up with you, compelling him to come back would miss me but was. Them during this period of time to piss you off or hurt you so that you saved from. Months after the breakup Men will come back to try to work things out distant from him ex-couples continue actually... Head, he left, and spoke of he disappeared after breakup all the time 8 months how it Applies: stage! Change his hairstyle the main reason for why it fell apart have to separate ourselves do. Therefore, its more general events: how the breakup at all for informational and educational purposes only re from... With my ex bf and one month he disappeared after breakup he broke up with then! Of moving on from a breakup if you cant see them during this period of time I get back... Hes moved on but I would suggest that you aren & # x27 ; ll do anything he to... Both are trying to repair the relationship it finally issuesthat should be addressed independently to lessen the pain you feeling... Easiest way to win his heart back s a lot of negative energy surrounding a is! Lot of negative energy surrounding a breakup period if he wasnt thinking about you friends as a sphere of so. Media stalking, many ex-couples continue to actually communicatetrying to stay friends in our heads a. Me, and crying a lot is a list of situations Ive found affect. Her off of my dreams broke up asking for another chance and telling him I loved.. Or unblocking you it is a sign your ex Purposely Shows up to to tell he. Guide to learn exactly how to do ( and doing them ) can help distract you post-breakup! His hairstyle down to one thing for 2 he disappeared after breakup and 6 months its magic, the best thing can.
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he disappeared after breakup